If your goal is to raise children emotionally smart, know that it is important to act in, let's say, specific ways with them.
According to a neuropsychologist who graduated from Harvard, there are some phrases, for example, that can literally halt the development of emotional intelligence in children.
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Therefore, thinking about helping you, we have brought some of these phrases below and we indicate what you should do to avoid saying them, including what you should say instead. Follow along!
'You do not listen to me'
There are some children who have sensory difficulties, and, to deal with this, it is necessary to understand what the child is feeling, what difficulties they have or if they have any discomfort.
Understanding this, it is possible to find a solution to the problem and avoid frustration. Parents need to listen to their children's needs.
So, instead of saying they don’t listen to you, you might consider asking the following question: “Did I listen to you?”
Children's brains go through a training process to explore the world and create autonomy in their identity. Therefore, it is important that parents not only want obedience from their children, but also want to generate a connection.
This shows that you care about how he feels and are willing to listen to his real needs.
‘You don’t perform well’
Our brain programs itself to stand out wherever and whenever it can, which is why children still have some difficulty this, and it doesn't mean they aren't trying hard to perform well, but rather because they aren't they can.
The big question is not whether or not you are motivated, but rather aligning the expectations of country with the capabilities that little ones present.
Instead of saying that, you can make an effort to find out where your child is most skilled and how they motivate themselves and then focus on those activities.
'You do not respect me'
It is very common for parents to end up jumping to conclusions about their children because of the behaviors they exhibit, based on insecurities that the parents themselves have.
Parents of teenagers often say that their child does not respect them, especially in some more specific matters such as doing school activities.
But, as soon as a dialogue is established, it is possible to see how much the child respects you and you can also understand if there is any difficulty regarding that situation.
Therefore, instead of saying that your son doesn't respect you, prefer a more intelligent way of dealing with it, asking him what he feels, what his needs are and explain that you are willing to listen to what he has to say without judgment.
