Being a mother or father is not an easy task, and one of the most important things is knowing the best way to communicate with your children. For children, parents are an example, a mirror of conduct to be followed and, therefore, words coming from them carry greater weight. Sometimes, when we have a busy day or are stressed, we end up over-toning our kids. However, there are some phrases that you should immediately stop saying to your children, as they can have a negative effect on their psychological development. Therefore, we have separated the 6 main toxic phrases that parents say to children so that you know and avoid talking.
6 toxic phrases parents say to their children
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1. “You are too sensitive.”
This very common and seemingly simple phrase can make your children shy about expressing their emotions. This has particularly negative effects on boys, who may repress their feelings and find it difficult to express themselves.
Psychologists say that repressing feelings can make boys not know how to handle situations well, leading to abuse of alcohol, drugs and even the use of violence.
2. “This is for girls.”
I'm sure you've heard a parent say that to their child. Normally, when girls are using toys made for boys, there is not much problem, but when boys decide to play, there is repression on the part of parents.
You psychologists this repression is said to prohibit boys from exploring their natural instincts to be caretakers, which harms them when they become fathers and raise their children. This practice creates an emotional distance between parents and children and affects the family's emotional connection.
3. "Boys do not Cry."
Probably the most famous phrase on the list. Boys are often taught not to cry or show their emotions and may be called "soft" or "weak".
An American psychologist says that the main cause for men to have problems in relationships and not know how to control their anger is this. This is explained by the fact that, as children, they were taught not to show sadness, which causes them to release only anger.
4. “Why aren't you like so-and-so?”
One of the worst things you can do to your child's self-esteem is to compare them to another child. This can lead them to live with unrealistic expectations and try to be perfect for their parents.
Psychologists say that comparison leads to burnout, depression, and feelings of failure. The best way to cope is to be understanding and accept your children's faults without comparing them.
5. “You must win.”
Receiving pressure from parents has become common these days. It turns out that overcharging is detrimental to children's self-confidence and development. Although they think they are motivating their children, in reality, parents are teaching them to only see results and not enjoy their experiences.
An American psychologist warns of the dangers of overcharging, which can make your children not enjoy the happy moments of life. That's because they always aim for success and the end result, but never the journey.
6. “Boys will always be boys.”
Parents use this phrase to justify their children's bad behavior. The problem is that this does not teach them about responsibility for their actions.
A psychologist specializing in children says that phrases like this teach that children are not responsible for their actions and will not be blamed for bad behavior. In addition, it sends a message that children should not hold back.