Fear is something necessary for survival. However, like everything else in life, its excess is harmful. A abandonment mentality, as the name already suggests, refers to the excessive fear of being left and this is worrying because it can be a fuel for toxic relationships. Follow this article and better understand this condition.
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abandonment mentality
The fear of abandonment can be very harmful, especially in romantic relationships, as those who fear abandonment abandonment usually develop obsessive behaviors and exaggerated attitudes that end up pushing the person away loved.
Often the abandonment mentality originates in childhood and is not necessarily related to the abandonment of the child. child in the sense of leaving it to other people to create, but rather in relation to the absence of care, affection and security. Such problems can reflect a lot on relationships during adult life.
Some people also develop this fear due to past experiences in their relationships where their partner simply left them. Consequently, there is a fear of experiencing the trauma again and this can destroy the new relationship.
But how to identify the abandonment mentality? We list some symptoms that deserve attention. However, professional follow-up with a psychologist is essential to better identify traumas and know the best way to deal with them.
1. You believe you don't deserve to be loved
This is a very common feeling for people with an abandonment mentality. Blame is recurrent and there is a belief of not being worthy of affection and, therefore, the person believes that there is a possibility of being abandoned at any time.
2. emotional rumination
Emotional rumination is also related to the abandonment mindset. But what is this? Basically, it's the constant repetition of thoughts, especially negative ones. The person is “walking in circles” with bad thoughts, thinking that they can be abandoned or betrayed at any time, for example.
3. fear of loneliness
Perhaps this is the most obvious symptom. The person with the abandonment mentality is constantly afraid of being alone, and attributes their happiness to another individual. This is especially dangerous because it can fuel toxic relationships. People often prefer to subject themselves to physical and psychological abuse due to fear of loneliness.
How to deal with the abandonment mentality?
As we mentioned earlier, it is important to seek professional help to identify the source of the problem and resolve it. Furthermore, it is important to bear in mind that everyone has value and is worthy of receiving affection, so there is no reason to be excessively afraid of abandonment.
