All parents want to help their children in the best way possible, but are some not crossing the line?
As an example, during the development phase, the best way to learn is through experience. This is not possible when parents supervise their children's every step 24 hours a day, even with the best intentions.
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To deepen and illustrate this subject, we describe below some attitudes of parents that can harm their children, instead of helping them to develop better. Check out!
The dangers of overprotection
Julie Lythcott-Haims, former head of Stanford and author of "How to Raise an Adult," believes that the overly protective parenting style of so-called "parenting" overprotective” or “helicopter parents”, does not bring benefits to the development of children.
According to her, “We ardently want to help them, guiding them from milestone to milestone and protecting them from failure and pain. However, this overprotection only causes harm.”
By trying to help their children too much, parents deprive them of developing skills such as determination and character, which are necessary to truly know themselves and build a fulfilling life.
This ends up generating anxiety and guilt-laden thoughts when they reach adulthood, as they do not have the necessary experience to deal with everyday situations.
When parents are overly involved in their children's lives, solving all the problems and challenges they face. face, end up preventing children from discovering who they really are, how to solve problems and how to adapt to the world as they adults.
Reflexes of overprotection
The rise in mental health problems among college students may be a reflection of how overprotective parents push their children towards academic excellence.
In 2013, the American College Health Association conducted a survey of nearly 100,000 college students from 153 different institutions, addressing their mental health over the past year. The results were alarming.
- 84% of students felt overwhelmed with the amount of tasks to be performed;
- 60% felt very sad;
- 57% felt extremely lonely;
- 51% faced overwhelming anxiety;
- 8% seriously considered the suicide.
Lythcott-Haims emphasizes that the role of parents is to allow their children to become independent by developing the skills needed to care for themselves.
Finally, she says, “We need to make sure our kids have the ability to wake up in the morning and mind their own business.”
